A dear, new friend of mine recently posted this picture to my facebook wall with the following caption:
"I will not leave you as orphans; I will come to you." John 14:18
The love, hope, and redemption that this picture shows is beyond what my heart can even contain. Two boys - formerly orphans - now members of loving families. Praise God. I've gone back to this picture many times over the past week. Lying on the couch with a fever, a rash, a headache, and a tropical disease tends to make me rather introspective.
I know that my son is mine. He holds my heart, calls me "mama," and shares my last name. But this week, from where I'm sitting, he's never felt more like an orphan. Because while I've been battling a serious illness here in my home, he's been battling the same...on the other side of the world. And there is absolutely nothing that I can do to comfort him. Over the past week:
Every time my doting husband held my hair back, refilled my gatorade, or brought me an extra blanket, I wondered...
Every time my worried mother left a voicemail, sent a text, or encouraged a follow-up appointment, I wondered...
When friends called, co-workers prayed, and doctors studied, I wondered...
Who is doing this for my son?
I know that my son is mine. He holds my heart, calls me "mama," and shares my last name. But this week, from where I'm sitting, he's never felt more like an orphan. Because while I've been battling a serious illness here in my home, he's been battling the same...on the other side of the world. And there is absolutely nothing that I can do to comfort him. Over the past week:
Every time my doting husband held my hair back, refilled my gatorade, or brought me an extra blanket, I wondered...
Every time my worried mother left a voicemail, sent a text, or encouraged a follow-up appointment, I wondered...
When friends called, co-workers prayed, and doctors studied, I wondered...
Who is doing this for my son?
The whole time that I've been sick, Eli has been too. And the whole time that I've been wishing my mom lived closer so that she could take care of me in only the way that a mom can, I dare say that - somewhere in his little heart, somewhere beyond words - Eli's been wishing that too.
This week, I learned that the only thing worse than being away from my mom when I'm sick is being away from my son when he is.
I know that Eli's basic needs are being met while he's living at the orphanage. I know that he's getting the absolute best that they can give, given the circumstances. But I also know that he needs to come home. He needs someone to hold him, rock him, snuggle him, nurture him, and give him undivided, one-on-one attention. He needs someone to learn his mannerisms: his cues and his cries. He needs someone to anticipate his needs and establish his routine. He needs individualized love, comfort, and care. He needs to know that he's no longer an orphan. He needs his mama.
This week, I learned that the only thing worse than being away from my mom when I'm sick is being away from my son when he is.
I know that Eli's basic needs are being met while he's living at the orphanage. I know that he's getting the absolute best that they can give, given the circumstances. But I also know that he needs to come home. He needs someone to hold him, rock him, snuggle him, nurture him, and give him undivided, one-on-one attention. He needs someone to learn his mannerisms: his cues and his cries. He needs someone to anticipate his needs and establish his routine. He needs individualized love, comfort, and care. He needs to know that he's no longer an orphan. He needs his mama.
On this Good Friday, my heart is heavy for all of the children of this world who are without their earthly families, and for all of the families who are separated from their children. But because I know how the story {and the weekend} ends, I have the peace of knowing that redemption is coming. I have the comfort of knowing that, no matter how it feels on the hard days, there is victory. That through Jesus, we have already been adopted into the family of God and there is no longer a single orphan among us. Including Eli. Forever.
That has never been more clear than it is on Easter weekend.
Amen.
That has never been more clear than it is on Easter weekend.
Amen.
{Now let's hurry up and get this little man healthy and home where he belongs!}